TheIrrelevantWriter

You’re absolutely right. I guess I whiffed as bad as Bauers 😅 I missed that 8th‑inning hit against the Phillies, the Pratt news dropped right after the game and I didn’t even bother checking the box score in my disgust. My bad. Thanks for pointing it out, and HEY, you nailed your prediction that I would get right! I’ll take my 1‑for‑9 proudly on the chin. and put you in my box score as PH next week.

Week 1 of the Milwaukee Metric Mix‑Up was… educational. I tried predicting exact stats, and baseball responded by laughing directly in my face. Turns out trying to nail specific numbers in a sport built entirely on chaos is a great way to go 0‑for‑the‑internet. So, this week, I’m tightening things up. The Mix‑Up is now running on a new system: every player gets a number from 1–5, and I can only use each number twice. The goal is simple, whatever number I pick for them, they just need to hit it or beat it. Cleaner. Smarter. Slightly less unhinged. Still very "Irrelevant". And yes, I’m sticking with the same stat categories from Week 1; except I’m switching out XBH for RBI, because I still can’t believe I forgot that one. So the pool is now: BB, SO, H, 2B, 3B, RBI, SB, HR, R. Every player gets one number and one metric, and if they meet or beat it, I get a hit in the Mix‑Up box score. Let’s get into it. Today’s Line Up: 1. Christian Yelich (L) DH 2. Jackson Chourio (R) LF 3. Brice Turang (L) 2B 4. William Contreras (R) C 5. Jake Bauers (L) RF 6. Andrew Vaughn (R) 1B 7. Garrett Mitchell (L) CF 8. Cooper Pratt (R) SS 9. David Hamilton (L) 3B SP: Robert Gasser LHP 0-3, 6.38 ERA 19 SO Games This Week (6/17-6/23) 6/17 Guardians 6/18 Guardians 6/19 Braves 6/20 Braves 6/21 Braves 6/22 Reds 6/23 Reds Metric Mix-up: Christian Yelich — DH YTD Stats: AVG .279 | OBP .353 | SLG .422 | 4 HR | 5 SB | 116 OPS+ Prediction: 3 BB Yelich’s last five games have been a weird mix- 6-for-18, a couple RBI, 3 walks, and 7 strikeouts, though five of those came in Vegas where everyone was swinging like they had the power button glued down. I’m expecting him to sit Thursday with lefty Parker Messick on the mound, but Wednesday feels like the real opportunity. Gavin Williams, the AL wins leader, forces hitters to slow the game down. I’m banking on Yeli having one of those veteran, patient nights that sets him up for a more disciplined week. Jackson Chourio — LF YTD Stats: AVG .322 | OBP .370 | SLG .572 | 9 HR | 5 SB | 158 OPS+ Prediction: 5 H Fresh off being named co–NL Player of the Week, Action Jackson is once again reminding everyone why he’s the future of the franchise. He’s gone 10-for-24 with 5 home runs and 9 RBI in his last five games, and right now he’s seeing the baseball roughly the size of a cantaloupe. And as the book says: you always hit on 11, and this 11 is hitting. When a 22‑year‑old gets this locked in, you ride the heater. I’m banking on at least five hits from the hottest bat in Milwaukee. Brice Turang — 2B YTD Stats: AVG .261 | OBP .378 | SLG .457 | 10 HR | 12 SB | 132 OPS+ Prediction: 1 SB Turang has been fighting it at the plate lately, reaching base just three times in his last five games. The contact is still there, but the results haven’t followed, and Vegas didn’t help; that whole series played like the circus was in town. So if the bat isn’t carrying him right now, the legs need to. When Brice does get on, he has to make it count, and I want to see him take full advantage of every rare trip to first base. I’m calling for one stolen base this week: a small number, but the right one for where he’s at. William Contreras — C YTD Stats: AVG .295 | OBP .352 | SLG .411 | 6 HR | 1 SB | 113 OPS+ Prediction: 2 HR Contreras’ last five games have been a roller coaster, a 0-for-4 with 3 strikeouts in Vegas, a Double Play pinch‑hit cameo, and then a steady climb back to form against Philly. He’s gone 6-for-13 in the last three games with a double, an RBI, and zero strikeouts, which is exactly the kind of “quiet correction” stretch he has before he unloads on one. The swing looks calmer, the takes are better, and the contact is getting louder. Wild Bill feels due, and I’m calling for two home runs this week to snap the drought and hopefully the contract-year-villain-arc starts this week. Jake Bauers — RF YTD Stats: AVG .267 | OBP .374 | SLG .519 | 13 HR | 5 SB | 147 OPS+ Prediction: 2 2B Bauers’ last five games have been a study in extremes, Vegas turned half the lineup into strikeout machines, and he wasn’t spared, but once the Brewers got back to Milwaukee he started squaring balls up again. He’s gone 6-for-12 in the Philly series with a double, a homer, and 3 RBI, and right now he’s either finding gaps or finding seats with almost nothing in between. When he’s locked in like this, the doubles tend to come in bunches. I’m calling for two this week; a perfect Mix‑Up “2” and exactly the kind of production Bauers gives you when the swing is synced. Andrew Vaughn — 1B YTD Stats: AVG .354 | OBP .431 | SLG .531 | 2 HR | 0 SB | 167 OPS+ Prediction: 4 SO Vaughn hasn’t had a ton of run lately, but he’s been quietly sharp when he’s in the lineup. Over his last five games he’s logged 2 hits, 5 walks, and just 1 strikeout, which is exactly the kind of profile you want when you’re banking on a low‑K week. With more plate appearances likely coming his way, the hope is that this patient version of Vaughn sticks, the one who’s seeing pitches, taking his walks, and refusing to chase himself into trouble. I’m calling for fewer than four strikeouts, a number that fits both the Mix‑Up and the approach he’s shown in June. Garrett Mitchell — CF YTD Stats: AVG .246 | OBP .349 | SLG .406 | 4 HR | 6 SB | 110 OPS+ Prediction: 4 R Mitchell’s last five games have been a strange split; some hitless nights, some loud ones, but one thing has stayed consistent: when he gets on, he finds a way home. He’s scored five runs in that stretch despite only reaching base six times, including a two‑run night against Philly and a three‑hit game in Vegas where he was basically teleporting around the bases. Even when the bat isn’t fully there, the speed, reads, and aggression absolutely are. So I’m leaning into the thing he’s doing best right now: turning baserunners into runs. I’m calling for four this week, a bet on Mitchell’s ability to manufacture offense the moment he touches first. Cooper Pratt — SS YTD Stats: AVG .000 | OBP .000 | SLG .000 | 0 HR | 0 SB | 0 OPS+ Prediction: 3 RBI The Brewers’ No. 4 prospect and the No. 63 prospect in all of baseball is stepping into The Show tonight, and if there’s one thing we’ve learned over the years, it’s that debut weeks have their own gravitational pull. Pratt’s been hitting everywhere he’s gone; elite bat‑to‑ball skills, mature approach, and that calm, unbothered presence that makes scouts talk about him like he’s been 22 for a decade. And now he gets his first taste of big‑league pitching. First stadium lights. First ovation. First “holy hell, I’m here” moment. Guys with his profile often find a way to make something happen early, a big swing, a clutch knock, a moment that sticks. So I’m leaning all the way into the debut‑week magic. I’m calling for 3 RBI from Pratt in his first week in Milwaukee: a Mix‑Up “3” powered by talent, adrenaline, and the baseball gods occasionally smiling on a kid’s first ride. David Hamilton — 3B YTD Stats: AVG .231 | OBP .316 | SLG .320 | 3 HR | 14 SB | 78 OPS+ Prediction: 1 3B I had one number left: a 1. And one metric left: triples. And honestly, if you’re going to bet on anyone in this lineup to leg out a three‑bagger, it’s David Hamilton. The man is fast. Like, “so fast he makes fast people look… not fast”- The Longest Yard. Even when the bat isn’t fully there, the speed absolutely is, and all he needs is one ball in the right gap or one outfielder taking the wrong angle for the wheels to take over. So I’m leaning into the chaos. I’m calling for one triple this week, a perfect Mix‑Up “1” and a bet on Hamilton’s ability to turn a routine hit into a track meet. And that wraps up this week’s Mix‑Up. Maybe these picks hit, maybe they miss, maybe they do that Brewers thing where they look great for 48 hours and then forget how to baseball until Tuesday. Either way, they’re locked in, typed during the sacred post‑bedtime window when the kids are finally asleep and I can stare at a box score like it’s the Zapruder film. Come back next week for the victory laps, the self‑roasting, and a fresh batch of predictions I absolutely did not whisper to myself while hiding from responsibility in the pantry. Last Week’s Results: Alright, now that this week’s chaos is officially on the books, let’s take a look back at last week’s picks and see which ones aged like fine wine and which ones aged like the McDonald’s milk that was left in my car by, apparently, nobody. Well… that was something. Not good something. Not even “funny bad” something. This was the kind of statistical meltdown that makes you wonder if the Brewers front office has a personal vendetta against my Google Doc. I didn’t just go 0‑for‑9 — I went “Luis Rengifo got DFA’d mid‑prediction” levels of 0‑for‑9. That’s commitment. That’s art. Let’s review the carnage: Yelich: Needed 4 XBH, got 1. Respectfully declined to participate. Chourio: Needed 6 runs, got 4. Close enough to hurt, far enough to mock me. Turang: Needed 3 doubles, got 1. He tried. Kind of. Contreras: Needed 4 homers, hit 0. Villain Arc I needed: Bane from Batman, Villain arc I got: Lord Farquaad, from Shrek. Bauers: Needed 2 or less strikeouts, got 7. "Can I help you?" Bauers: "Nope, just looking." Mitchell: Needed 2 steals, got 0. My man has become a conscientious objector to stealing. Frelick: Needed 1 triple, got 0. Triples are chaos; chaos chose violence. Rengifo: Needed 2 hits, got 1… and then got DFA’d. My man literally left the roster to avoid my prediction. Hamilton: Needed 5 walks, got 0. He said “no thank you” to the entire concept of plate discipline. Lower your expectations, -Irrelevant Follow a writer on X whose relevancy cannot be understated: @IrrelevantRiter

Where I grab the one number that I think actually matters for each pitcher and let it do the talking. Monday isn’t for stat dumps. It’s for honesty. The weekend is over, the vibes have settled, and whatever the bullpen did is now sitting in the cold light of day like a notification you’ve been ignoring. So let’s check in on the arms that mattered; one pitcher, one stat, one story. Craig Yoho — The (Kinda) New Guy With Real Stuff Craig Yoho returned to Milwaukee looking like a pitcher who wants to make this a permanent address. Three innings, twelve batters, five strikeouts, that’s not a cameo, that’s a statement. Sure, he left one 79 mph changeup floating in the middle of the plate and Hunter Goodman sent it to a different time zone. But everything else? Crisp. Confident. Big‑league quality. And when you pair that with how he carved in Triple‑A, you can see the outline of a real bullpen piece forming. He doesn’t nibble. He doesn’t pitch scared. He attacks hitters like he’s been here longer than two games this year. The stuff plays. Now he just needs the innings to match it. Grant Anderson — The Steady Hand Every bullpen needs one guy who doesn’t make you clench your jaw. For the Brewers, that’s Grant Anderson. He’s not flashy. He’s not dramatic. He’s not throwing 102. He’s just… reliable. One earned run in all of May. That’s the stat. That’s the story. Anderson is the pitcher you call when the inning feels like it’s about to turn into a group project gone wrong. He shows up, throws strikes, gets outs, and leaves without making a scene. He doesn’t need velocity or theatrics; just a plan, a strike zone, and the confidence to execute both. Chad Patrick — The Chaos Arm With a Secret Chad Patrick is a walking contradiction. Some outings look like he’s auditioning for a highlight reel. Others look like he’s trying to escape a burning building with a blindfold on. But here’s the twist: he might not be that bad. His ERA is messy. His FIP? 2.52. That’s the stat that I think matters. That’s the stat that says, “Hey, maybe the universe is messing with me.” Patrick is the classic “better than the results” reliever; the kind who’s one clean week away from flipping the narrative entirely. The stuff is there. The strikeouts are there. The foundation is there. He’s not consistent yet. But he’s close. Aaron Ashby — The Accidental Ace of Wins Reliever wins are supposed to be meaningless. They’re baseball’s version of astrology: mostly nonsense, occasionally spooky. But Aaron Ashby? He leads the entire National League with 9 wins. More than Harrison. More than Misiorowski. More than every starter who’s actually trying to get them. And here’s the part that makes it real: In those nine wins, Ashby has allowed one run across 13.1 innings. That’s not luck. That’s a reliever doing exactly what a reliever is supposed to do. He’s entering tie games, holding the line, and giving the Brewers a chance to take the lead. He’s the bullpen’s pressure valve, the guy who shows up when the game is wobbling and quietly pushes it back upright. And then, out of nowhere, he touched 100.3 mph for the first time in his career. Not a sign of some new era; just a fun little “wait, he can do that?” moment. He’s become the Brewers’ human reset button, the pitcher who walks in, settles everything down, and lets the offense breathe again. Closing Thoughts The Brewers’ bullpen is a strange little ecosystem, part upside, part chaos, part quiet competence. Yoho brings the freshness. Anderson brings the calm. Patrick brings the intrigue. Ashby brings the wins. Monday is the perfect day to sort through all of it and figure out what’s real, what’s noise, and what’s quietly becoming the backbone of this team. See you next week for another Monday Mound Check‑In. Milwaukee Metric Mix-up Week 1 Results Teaser The first week of the Milwaukee Metric Mix-up is in the books, and the results are already shaking up the conversation. Stay tuned for the full breakdown and some surprising performances that could change the way we look at the Brewers bullpen. -Irrelevant

It’s the last Friday night before summer break, and I’m sitting here with the kind of “weekend energy” only a parent understands: a bottle of water pretending to be something stronger, West Coast games on at a volume so low it might as well be closed captions, and a laptop that’s seen more Brewers takes than any machine should reasonably endure. I wasn’t planning to write tonight. I really wasn’t. But then Jacob Misiorowski went out and threw a complete game shutout, a Maddux, with 15 strikeouts; on the anniversary of his MLB debut. He broke the record for fastest pitch ever thrown by a starting pitcher at 105. He threw fifty‑eight pitches over 100 mph like it was a casual suggestion. He faced the minimum. He allowed one hit that immediately disappeared like it offended him. And right after the final out, my best friend texted me: “Is that the best Brewers pitching performance ever?” I didn’t hesitate. I didn’t think. I didn’t breathe. I just typed: “Yes.” And then I sat there, staring at my own message, realizing what I had just said, because for twenty‑plus years, I’ve had a sacred No. 1. A performance I’ve protected like a family heirloom. A game thrown by the pitcher whose autographed card I still keep like it’s a piece of my childhood. Tonight didn’t erase that. But it did something I never thought possible: It made me rethink the list. So here it is: my Top 5 Brewers Pitching Performances of All Time, written in reverse order because drama matters and because tonight deserves a build‑up. 5. Corbin Burnes — The 14‑K No‑Hit Bid (September 11, 2021) Burnes was a scalpel that night. Eight innings, fourteen strikeouts, one walk, and the kind of command that makes hitters question their life choices. He didn’t get to finish it, but he didn’t need to, the dominance was undeniable. It was the moment he fully stepped into acehood. However, it is not his best pitching performance as a Brewer.. Burnes was really dealing a month earlier. 4. CC Sabathia — The Carry Job (September 28, 2008) This wasn’t dominance. This was heroism. CC pitched like a man who had been told the season depended on him; because it did. Short rest? Didn’t matter. Heavy workload? Didn’t matter. He threw a complete game and dragged the Brewers into the postseason by sheer force of will. It’s the most important pitching performance in franchise history ending the 25-year playoff drought. 3. Corbin Burnes — The 10 Straight Strikeouts Game (August 11, 2021) Fifteen strikeouts in six innings. Ten in a row. A franchise record, an MLB record, and a masterclass in what happens when elite stuff meets elite command. Burnes made the Cubs look like they were swinging underwater. This was the day he became inevitable. This was Burnes’ best game as a Brewer. 2. Ben Sheets — The 18‑Strikeout Masterpiece (May 16, 2004) This one is personal. Sheets wasn’t just a Brewer; he was my Brewer. My childhood favorite. The guy whose autographed card I still cherish like it’s a piece of who I was at ten years old. And for two decades, this game: eighteen strikeouts, one walk, a curveball that should’ve been classified as a controlled substance, was untouchable. It’s still perfect. It’s still sacred. It’s still the performance that made me fall in love with pitching. But tonight… someone finally matched the feeling. 1. Jacob Misiorowski — The 105 MPH Maddux (June 12, 2026) A complete game shutout. Fifteen strikeouts. Ninety‑five pitches. Fifty‑eight triple‑digit fastballs. The fastest pitch ever thrown by a starting pitcher in the Statcast era. Facing the minimum. On the anniversary of his debut. This wasn’t a pitching performance. This was a franchise moment. The kind of game where you know, instantly, that you’ll remember where you were, what you were doing, and how you felt. The kind of game that forces you to rewrite your own personal history. The kind of game that makes you text your best friend “yes” without hesitation. Tonight, Jacob Misiorowski didn’t just throw the best game in Brewers history. He threw the kind of game that changes the way you talk about baseball. Closing Thoughts I didn’t plan to write tonight. But baseball doesn’t care about your plans. Baseball hands you nights like this, nights where a 24‑year‑old kid throws 105 mph and makes you rethink your entire childhood pitching hierarchy. Then, all you can do is sit down, open the laptop, and try to capture the feeling before it fades. If this is how the summer starts, I’m not sure I’m emotionally prepared for the rest. P.S. Updated Milwaukee Metric Mix‑Up Lineup · Brice Turang: finally cracked one. Doubled in the bottom of the 5th, which puts him at 1 of the 3 doubles I predicted. Quiet night otherwise, but the man delivered the one thing I needed. · Garrett Mitchell: the baserunning was better, going first to third on a bunt + grounder in the second is the kind of chaos he was born to create, but the stolen base drought continues. No attempts since May 29. No successful steals since May 14. At this point, I’m convinced he’s saving all his stolen base energy for the exact moment it ruins your prediction. Everything else stays as is. Christian Yelich: 4 XBH - 1 Jackson Chourio: 6 R - 1 Brice Turang: 3 2B - 1 William Contreras: 4 HR - 0 Jake Bauers: 2 SO - 4 Garrett Mitchell: 2 SB – UGHHHHH 0 Sal Frelick: 1 3B - 0 Luis Rengifo: 2 H - 1 David Hamilton: 5 BB – 0 Lower your expectations. -Irrelevant

I had no idea there were guys throwing curveballs faster than 87 consistently enough to qualify, that’s insane to me. Now I’m curious what the BB/9 looks like for the top four guys on that list. I can’t think of many names off the top of my head… maybe Chase Burns sneaks in there? I’ve also been trying to pay attention to Misiorowski’s curveball location vs righties. He seems to be trying the inside corner, but it feels like he leaves it low-middle/middle‑middle just enough for decent contact, kind of like the Suzuki clip in the article. Really enjoyed this breakdown. Thanks for the great read.

Okay, so I think I was juuuuust a bit outside on the Jake Bauers strikeout prediction… thanks, Jake. But hey, we still saw some progress! Christian Yelich: 4 XBH - already picked up 1 with that double Jackson Chourio: 6 R - grabbed 1 last night Brice Turang: 3 2B - quiet so far William Contreras: 4 HR - villain arc pending Jake Bauers: 2 SO - struck out 4 times because of course he did Garrett Mitchell: 2 SB - still waiting Sal Frelick: 1 3B - TBD Luis Rengifo: 2 H - went 1‑1, halfway home David Hamilton: 5 BB - none yet, but the week is young Small victories count. I’m making a slight tweak to the format for next week; something cleaner, more obtainable, and honestly a lot more fun. Stay tuned for the upgraded chaos. FG.FTC. -Irrelevant

Well that sucked. Time to see philly

OH NOW IT WORKS!!!

Ben Sheets 18K type games 😂

oh Bauers..

Earlier in the chat I made a joke about him going 7. I should have quoted it

sorry dumb joke. The new injury that happened a lot this spring was a Hamate bone injury, the first time I heard it (and for months) I thought they were saying Handsmaid (a popular Netflix show) my bad.

Damn.. so close to 7 shutty

I havent heard of anyone's Handsmaid get broken before this season either but sure as stuff it happens 😆

Chourio better slow his roll! i dont need to hear about some chipped shoulder blade or some s**t

Bauers ❌

This is Stan

F****n 12 aint enough 😆

Not really relevant but I still hate Jeff McNeil.

Yeli XBH!!!

Sproat looks like the pissed off uncle at the wiffle ball game who just struck out the showboating teenager.

HELL YEAH!!!! SPROAT GOOOOAAAAATTTT!!!!!

shhh shh shhh hes cooking

I made a blog 2 days ago with stat predictions for next week and Jake was striking out the LEAST amongst brewers in Colorado and LV to date.. I blew my projection on day one 😅

DERBY IN THE DESERT!!