Do the first 6 innings in 3 inning offensive increments (clear the bases after 3 outs). Have advertisements scrolling on the bottom. Lower the mound. Do a pitch clock. Profit.
All I care about is the record regardless of how we get there. However, an 88 win pace is not sustainable with an offense that is this bad. Kudos to you for enjoying this brand of baseball.
Am I crazy for being okay with having a slightly poorer record but having an offense that doesn't completely suck? A pitching duel every once in a while is fine but this is hard to watch.