To answer your question, DHonks, I cannot answer your question because I cannot read the future. However, it sounds like you do do things with the boy, but just not as a group of 3. Does the boy attend the school you teach at? If so, watching him practice and taking him home after may not count for a whole lot since you are there already and just doing it for convenience sake for your g/f. Is your perception of him affected by how you see him at school. Because I think everyone's perception of their kids would be different. You just have the inside scoop. I don't have kids, but may some day soon, and I think that time with the g/f alone would dwindle and family time would take over once we have kids. I think your situation is different as you're being pressured to family time sooner than most. I get to ease into it. For you, it's either accept it or not. When I do have kids, I'm sure I'll have the same transition period you have right now. I'd sometimes want to spend time with just my wife. But the kids get in the way. It will take a while for our lives to adjust in that manner. I agree that if you do marry her someday, you do have a responsibility and a say in the discipline, but you should work that out beforehand. If you've never had a fight before, maybe now is the time to raise some hairy issues that you have with the son and with the g/f. Disagreements are part of relationships. Don't be afraid of them. You are learning on the job right now. You might do what feels right right now, but regret it a few months from now. It might work out best for the three of you.