Let's All Pretend That Nestor Cortes Start Didn't Happen

[Brandon Glick]

In his first start for the Milwaukee Brewers, Nestor Cortes will face the Cincinnati Reds on April 3.

Image courtesy of Angelina Katsanis/Associated Press

So, that sucked.

Nestor Cortes, one of two pieces returned to the Milwaukee Brewers for closer Devin Williams in an offseason trade with the New York Yankees, made his first start in a Brewers uniform against the same team that discarded him over the winter.

It, uh, did not go well.

On his first three pitches of the game, Cortes surrendered three consecutive home runs, setting a new, dubious MLB record. Not a great start, but don't worry — it didn't get any better from there. When all things were said and done, Cortes allowed five home runs in two innings of work, yielding eight earned runs, six hits, and five walks in total.

Of course, taking Cortes out (mercifully) after just two innings didn't turn things around. His immediate relief, Connor Thomas, gave up eight more runs in his own two frames of work, though at least he only surrendered three home runs. When Oswald Peraza hit a home run against rookie Chad Patrick — making his MLB debut — to make the game 20-6, both squads set franchise records: the Yankees for home runs hit (nine), and the Brewers for home runs surrendered (miraculously, also nine). Jake Bauers was the only pitcher for the Brewers not to allow a run by virtue of his scoreless eighth inning.

So, yea. This is not how the season was meant to start for the Brewers. It's one thing to fall to 0-2 against the reigning American League champions. It's another for the prized offseason acquisition in the rotation to get lit up in ways that should probably be illegal.

I say, let's just toss this one out. The Yankees, despite losing Juan Soto this winter, still have a dynamic offense led by all-universe slugger Aaron Judge. Cortes was clearly amped up to face his former team, and they know his tendencies better than anyone. The southpaw loves to mess with hitter's timing and attack the strike zone early and often. It's clear that Judge informed Paul Goldschmidt and Cody Bellinger of that, and the top of the aptly named Bronx Bombers' lineup took care of the rest.

Does that excuse the unsightly performance Cortes just gave the Brewers? No, but what else is there to take away from this game? He couldn't find the strike zone, and when he did, the ball went over the outfield fence. Sometimes, you just gotta collect the game tape and burn it.

Major League Baseball nor Baseball Reference will wipe his stats from this game, but let's all just use the neuralyzer from Men In Black and erase Saturday's game from our collective memories. A new season for Cortes begins next week. Or, at least, I hope it does.

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[Frisbee Slider]

Cortes velocity was down a little bit. I’m not smart enough to know if his pitches lacked movement compared to usual though. 

[Michael Trzinski]

And in looking at the front page pic, the outing turned his hair gray!

[Brandon Glick]

On 3/30/2025 at 7:45 AM, Frisbee Slider said:

Cortes velocity was down a little bit. I’m not smart enough to know if his pitches lacked movement compared to usual though. 

His fastball velocity was down 1.5 mph, which is obviously the biggest concern. His spin rates were down, too, and the eye test just made his stuff seem flat. Hopefully the Brewers can pinpoint a few things that went wrong in the delivery, cause otherwise those are telltale signs of injury.

[Ron750]

I don’t expect Attanasio to have a payroll that competes with the big markets. But he has 14 players making $800k. Shouldn’t he be able to afford a number four or five starter that doesn’t get hurt after two games? Like Colin Rea?