Out of fear and respect, President Bush passed legislation to rename Mother's Day. Its new name will be "Bill Hall presents Mother's Day" Bill Hall's mother was the first professional female baseball player. She has thrown every perfect game in the history of baseball. Bill Hall once played shortstop, second base, and outfield in an afternoon game at Miller Park against the Astros. He then took 94 east to start at point gaurd for the Bucks in a game against the Rockets. The game was the first shutout in NBA history. The next day, the Texans instantly forfieted their game against the Packers after hearing that Bill Hall would be starting at quarterback. The city of Houston has since been renamed Bill Hall, Texas. Bill Hall once hit a walk-off home run in the bottom of the ninth, but his thirst for victory wasn't fully quenched, so he insisted that the game go on. The umpires held a quick conference, decided to continue the game, and then threw out the opposing manager, pitcher and entire outfield for looking at Bill Hall. He hit another walk-off home run in the 10th. It landed in Lambeau Field. PPD stands for 'Postponed because Bill Hall says so'. There is no such thing as the 'strike zone'. After each pitch, the umpire simply looks to Bill Hall, who either nods or shakes his head. Earlier this season, after beating the Reds 11-0, Bill Hall decided it wasn't fair and played for Cinncinati the next day. Baseball used to have a 10th position called Bill Hall, but he got bored and decided to become a super-utility player. Miller Park was only built because Bill Hall decided to move County Stadium to his backyard in order to host an annual reenactment of the movie 'Major League', in which he plays Rick 'Wild Thing' Vaugn, Jake Taylor, and Roger Dorn. The only differences are that he renamed the character to Rick 'Bill Hall' Vaugn and the Cleveland Indians win the world series as well as the World Baseball Classic. "Miracle" was initially supposed to be an autobiographical movie about Bill Hall, but Corey Koskie begged him to make it about hockey instead. Billy complied, but only allows Koskie to start at third out of pity. Bill Hall was the MVP of the 1982 ALCS. Pete Rose was betting on Bill Hall. Can you blame him? That isn't a wad of tobacco in Bill Hall's mouth, it's barbed-wire. He says it "levels the playing-field." Bill Hall sometimes likes attending Cubs games under the alias, Steve Bartman. Fans at Wrigley Field don't throw back home run balls. Coincidentally, those are all Bill Hall home runs landing. Brady Clark's average went down this year because Bill Hall wanted to try center field. Brett Favre was never addicted to Vicodin, he was addicted to Bill Hall. To help encourage Brett to kick the habit, Billy gave him the three consecutive NFL MVP awards he had won. Bill Hall once went into the Miller Brewery and helped himself to some fine beverages. The resulting shortage led Miller Park concession workers to raise the price of beer from $0.50 to $7.00. The words to 'Take me out to the ballgame' were originally "and root, root, root for Bill Hall," but everytime it was sung, the crowd reacted so loudly that an earthquake destroyed the stadium, so he allowed it to be changed. Bill Hall runs in the sausage race in each game. He switches every day so that each sausage has an equal chance to win. Once, after batting practice, the umpires realized that they had simply run out of baseballs. It turns out that Bill Hall had hit all of them out of the stadium. Feeling responsible, Bill Hall poured 5,000 full cups of water out of a single water-cooler. He then turned the water into baseballs.